Sunday 27 January 2013

Hi Blog

Sometime when you thought your good friends understand you. Is totally wrong. THey don't understand you. I went to find them to talk. I know i'm whining everyday. But Im stress to a point that I really cried almost every night. I was thrown into a situation where is my first time doing myself and was thrown to do senior job and even manager job. They never conduct planning when all this are supposed to be done before Audit. Yet, now i am the one, alone doing it. I was with a senior in another engagment, they said the planning stage are done by manager and senior with 1 WEEK. Now i'm the only person in the team and i need to do within 1day? what is this? i'm really very stress. But my good friends sought of don't believe me. Keep asking if it is a phase that normally ppl go? No it don't. It is the mananager that is new and don't know how to plan his fucking work. Now i'm thrown to do everything myself. How am i suppose to do when all this require years of experience. Last year 2 seniors, one assistant and one manager doing it. Now i am doing this alone. I'm taking a four person job alone. How can i do it. you want to pay me four person pay? Do you know i really sleep at 3am everyday. And now i tried to sleep earlier at 2 am to wake up and 5am to do everyday. I also spent my saturday and sunday doing this stupid assignment. When i'm really stressed out that i went to play a few games with kelvin to de-stress. end up even more work accumulated. But do anyone really know my situation? No. All they comment is try to adapt. what? how to? i'm already sleeping 3 hrs a day. you call me to adapt to his? can you do it first? seriously. And also i get comment like they wanna test you, is it normal phase and keep repeating the same comment. Please if you don't really understand, don't say this kind of comments. It is really insensitive. Talking is so much easier. anw, it is my own luck and my choice to go into this company. But after this incident, i just realise i'm not really close to them... disappointed.. really.. i'm not whining to them anyomore as it really make me feel worse. Hope the client don't give me any problems. they keep changing their FS and their evidence given to me is always wrong and their schedules don't tally with the FS.. how do i do?? Please.. i really cannot take this anymore.. i'm feeling really helpless.. or please find someone who understand me and counsel me. what should i do?